Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ
by: Daniel C. Goleman
Topics include: emotional literacy classes, emotional lessons, left prefrontal lobe, emotional circuitry, emotional hijackings, timid children, emotional brain, emotional mind, prefrontal lobes, emotional intelligence
Not exactly what it appears to be
There is a lot to admire here and I enjoyed returning to a genre (popular psychology) that I left many years ago. If my recollection is correct, Goleman's book is a step beyond such "classics" as I'm Okay, You're Okay..., etc., particularly in terms of scholarship. I liked the way he took the medical profession to task for its lack of empathy and its failure to provide emotional support for patients. He does not however address the cause, which is the desire of the AMA and its members to maintain the exclusivity and high economic status of the profession. I loved the affection Goleman showed for the children learning to be social.
However I don't think the book is about emotional so much as social intelligence, and perhaps that is entirely to the good since social intelligence is a fundamental human need, and certainly for most people it is easier to learn social skills than it is to discard negative emotions and achieve positive ones. Most of the book is about how to behave effectively in society, how to make adjustments in marriage, on the job, with peers, at school, etc. Some space is given to the experiences in childhood that mold us emotionally (or so it is believed).
This is all fine, but I don't think Goleman makes much of a case for changing emotions as he does for changing behavior. Of course, I'm all for that: if you don't feel empathy, at least fake it! On page 107 for example he talks about the "utter lack of empathy for their victims" by "child molesters and other such offenders." He describes "one of the most promising treatment programs" in which "the offenders read heart-wrenching accounts of crimes like their own, told from the victim's perspective." The psychologist who developed the program claims that the recidivism rate for those who complete the program is half that of those who did not receive the treatment. Even if true, it doesn't follow that these guys learned any empathy. Most likely they learned more clever behavior, and of course the people who entered and stayed with the program are preselected to not return for any number of reasons, mainly they're smarter.
I have a similar objection to the idea (for example) that depression leads to increased death and disease. Certainly the life expectancy of depressed people is less than that of optimistic people, but it is not clear whether depression is a cause or a symptom. And the well known connection between social isolation and morbidity reported by Goleman doesn't necessarily mean that social isolation kills, but could mean that people who want to die, first isolate themselves from society, which is the way in some cultures-or it could mean something else entirely.
I also object to the general idea that emotions, instruments of the evolutionary mechanism, can or should be much influenced by society except in self-defense. The purpose of many emotions is to drive the individual in a direction consistent with the needs of the species mechanism regardless of what society or the individual wants. The needs, concerns and prejudices of any given society are relatively ephemeral notions compared to the evolutionary imperative, and in many cases it's a good thing we have instincts that override what society wants.
Goleman's book is understandably written from the point of view of the society and as such puts social concerns first; however I am at that place in my life where I find the concerns of the individual to be more important. The (rather limited) psychological tradition that Goleman is an effective spokesman for, is not to me as important or as valuable or even as "true" as the psychological ideas found in the great religions of the world.
One last very important quibble: nowhere in the book is the most deleterious emotion mentioned or identified as such. That emotion is desire. Goleman, unaccountably, does not even identify sexual desire! He lists love in Appendix A but it is apparent that sexual desire is not part of that classification (p. 289). He allows that there are "hundreds of emotions." The fact that he does not recognize desire would be amazing except we know that his readers would not like to hear about any problems with desire, and this book is pristinely PC with a clear eye to the marketplace. Desire is what keeps the economic machine of the society that he represents going! As the economists say, goods are limited, but human desires are infinite. Additionally the secret to avoiding the inevitable pain caused by desire is not any attempt to fulfill those desires, but to lose the desires. That formula would not sit well with his readers nor with his publishers.
Goleman is accomplished and clever. He went to the best schools and he has made quite a success of his education. He is politically astute, and he may be an expert on emotion, but he should know that the splashy idea of emotional intelligence is as vague, subjective and limiting as that of IQ, perhaps more so.
Reviews:
Amazon.com
There was a time when IQ was considered the leading determinant of success. In this fascinating book, based on brain and behavioral research, Daniel Goleman argues that our IQ-idolizing view of intelligence is far too narrow. Instead, Goleman makes the case for "emotional intelligence" being the strongest indicator of human success. He defines emotional intelligence in terms of self-awareness, altruism, personal motivation, empathy, and the ability to love and be loved by friends, partners, and family members. People who possess high emotional intelligence are the people who truly succeed in work as well as play, building flourishing careers and lasting, meaningful relationships. Because emotional intelligence isn't fixed at birth, Goleman outlines how adults as well as parents of young children can sow the seeds.
From Publishers Weekly
New York Times science writer Goleman argues that our emotions play a much greater role in thought, decision making and individual success than is commonly acknowledged. He defines "emotional intelligence"?a trait not measured by IQ tests?as a set of skills, including control of one's impulses, self-motivation, empathy and social competence in interpersonal relationships. Although his highly accessible survey of research into cognitive and emotional development may not convince readers that this grab bag of faculties comprise a clearly recognizable, well-defined aptitude, his report is nevertheless an intriguing and practical guide to emotional mastery. In marriage, emotional intelligence means listening well and being able to calm down. In the workplace, it manifests when bosses give subordinates constructive feedback regarding their performance. Goleman also looks at pilot programs in schools from New York City to Oakland, Calif., where kids are taught conflict resolution, impulse control and social skills.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Scientific data emerging from studies using new brain imaging technologies have yielded fresh understanding of how emotions work and, argues the author, suggest ways to regulate the more negative emotions responsible for the horrendous acts of violence that are the stuff of daily headlines. The book calls for universal adoption of educational curricula that teach youngsters how to regulate their emotional responses and to resolve conflict peacefully. Along the way Goleman summarizes much of the best psychological work of the last few decades on such topics as the importance of learned optimism, the theory of multiple intelligences, the role of innate temperamental differences, and the importance of emotional intelligence in marriage, management, and medicine. Based on good empirical data (unlike many popular psychology books), this fine example is recommended for academic and larger public libraries.?Mary Ann Hughes, Neill P.L., Pullman, Wash.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From AudioFile
Excellent research, clear writing and a fluid abridgment will please both the casual and serious student of how people combine emotions and thinking in daily functioning. With a wise-sounding speaking voice the author uses captivating social vignettes to introduce each new section. Concise references to current research describe successful applications of his theory. The logic of this material and its social relevance are powerful and persuasive. The listener's interest and grasp of the material are maintained without pedantic introductions or musical transitions. This program sets a new standard for the abridgment and performance of a psychological work. T.W. (c)AudioFile, Portland, Maine -
From Booklist
If your class valedictorian did not become the soaring success everyone predicted, perhaps his IQ exceeded his EQ. Psychologist Daniel Goleman's latest book is a fascinating depiction of the role emotional intelligence plays in defining character and determining destiny. He has produced an eminently readable and persuasive work that shows us how to develop our emotional intelligence in ways that can improve our relationships, our parenting, our classrooms, and our workplaces. Goleman assures us that our temperaments may be determined by neurochemistry, but they can be altered. We could turn society on its ear if we learned to recognize our emotions and control our reactions; if we combined our thinking with our feeling; if we learned to follow our flow of feelings in our search for creativity. This well-researched work persuades us to teach our children an important lesson: humanity lies in our feelings, not our facts. This is an engrossing, captivating work that should be read by anyone who wants to improve self, family, or world. Patricia Hassler
Review
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society."
--Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are
Review
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society."
--Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are
Book Description
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until Emotional Intelligence, we could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's brilliant report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers startling new insight into our "two minds"--the rational and the emotional--and how they together shape our destiny.
Through vivid examples, Goleman delineates the five crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships, work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is an entirely new way to talk about being smart.
The best news is that "emotional literacy" is not fixed early in life. Every parent, every teacher, every business leader, and everyone interested in a more civil society, has a stake in this compelling vision of human possibility.
From the Publisher
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society."
--Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are
Inside Flap Copy
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until Emotional Intelligence, we could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's brilliant report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers startling new insight into our "two minds"--the rational and the emotional--and how they together shape our destiny.
Through vivid examples, Goleman delineates the five crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships, work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is an entirely new way to talk about being smart.
The best news is that "emotional literacy" is not fixed early in life. Every parent, every teacher, every business leader, and everyone interested in a more civil society, has a stake in this compelling vision of human possibility.
From the Back Cover
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society." -- Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are
About the Author
Daniel Goleman, Ph.D., covers the behavioral and brain sciences for The New York Times and his articles appear throughout the world in syndication. He has taught at Harvard (where he received his Ph.D.) and was formerly senior editor at Psychology Today. His previous books include Vital Lies, Simple Truths and, as co-author, The Creative Spirit
Many interesting things to consider, but becomes monotonous
I must admit I'm torn between a thumbs up and a thumbs down for this book (hence, 3 stars). Author Daniel Goleman does a fine job of employing a vast library of behavioral research in support of the premise that emotional conditioning plays a dominant role in what we perceive as "intelligence." Even though one can learn lots from Goleman's work, the overriding theme here seems to me to be ridiculously simple: good nurturing (rather than aptitude) is more likely to produce exceptional humans; bad nurturing creates people with a bunch of problems.
The book starts off great, with a look at what happens in the brain at the molecular level under all sorts of emotional experiences. That's Part One (Goleman recommends skipping this if you're not into neurological details), which turned out to be the most interesting for me, as I had never before learned much about the emotional "architecture" of the brain.
In Parts Two through Five, the author expounds on feelings (e.g., anger, empathy, passion, depression), personality, upbringing, aptitude, and treatment, etc., citing study after study to show that today's children are most decidedly a product of how they were treated in their earliest years, but nevertheless are winding up far less able then their ancestors were to handle even the slightest emotional dilemma. In fact, the further on you read, the more you'll realize that "Emotional Intelligence" is a book about children. Why is their character deteriorating, and what can we do to mold them into more emotionally strong (intelligent) beings? That's okay: if you're a parent, educator, or child psychologist, definitely buy this book. It will help.
As for me, I appreciated Goleman's connection of personality with science in an unexpected, enlightening way. However, except for Part One, I got so bogged down in page after page of studies and stats, all concluding the same thing over and over again, that it became a chore to plow through to the end. Overall, this is a monumental work, but I can't recommended it to everyone.
The abriged audio tape version of "Emotional Itelligence" conveys highly technical information on the exact topic identified by the title: why emotional itelligence matter more than IQ. The two tape set identifies area after area in your life where emotional intelligence interacts with and occasionally superceeds IQ. This information is interesting, and well supported with cited case studies. The presentation is highly technical, as you might expect from a graduate level course, and mostly lacking the entertainment aspect emphasized by most audio tapes. The only problem I have with this tape is that it offers no advice whatsoever on how to improve your emotional intelligence. There isn't even any advice on where to go to get such information. Aspects of emotional intelligence are defined, and the impact they have on your life is identified, but nothing more.
This is one of the best books ever written because it truly makes the case for the value of emotional intelligence. We have all met people who have high IQ's but are not in control of their emotions and sabotage their lives. I bought this book after reading the reviews and it is worth every cent. Emotional Intelligence helps us to understand how to get along with others. I also bought Optimal Thinking: How To Be Your Best Self based on the same reviews and agree that Optimal Thinking provides the actual "How" to master disturbing feelings, achieve emotional mastery and get our most important needs met. Emotional Intelligence deserves 5 stars for providing the "Why" and Optimal Thinking deserves 5 stars for providing the "How."